35

This song has been running through my head for the past four days.

near to you

he and I had something beautiful
but so dysfunctional, it couldn't last
I loved him so but I let him go
‘cause I knew he'd never love me back

such pain as this
shouldn't have to be experienced
I'm still reeling from the loss,
still a little bit delirious

near to you, I am healing
but it's taking so long
'cause though he's gone
and you are wonderful
it's hard to move on
yet, I'm better near to you.

you and I have something different
and I'm enjoying it cautiously
I'm battle scarred,
but I am working oh so hard
to get back to who I used to be

he's disappearing, fading steadily
well, I'm so close to being yours,
won’t you stay with me, please

near to you, I am healing
but it's taking so long
'cause though he's gone
and you are wonderful
it’s hard to move on
yet, I'm better near to you

I only know that
I am better where you are
I only know that
I am better where you are
I only know that I belong
where you are

near to you, I am healing
but it's taking so long
'cause though he's gone
and you are wonderful
it’s hard to move on
yet, I'm better near to you

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I meant to post yesterday, really I did, I just got caught up in work. Had to turn in a work plan - I told my boss that my "plan" was to work. heh. She laughed.

Work has been rather delightful this week. My co-worker, who received my name in our secret santa exchange, bought me this (the book of randomness) delightful, wonderful, most bestest gift ever. BUT the very best part is that Lem - the author - has autographed it AND drawn an adorable pet peev in it. Needless to say I was thrilled beyond words. I was EEEEEEE! all day yesterday.

~BEST GIFTS THIS YEAR!~
>Bunny: Book of Random - signed and properly defiled <-- authors words not mine. >pet fetishes -- friends to my peev (made by my favorite cousin)
>a working dryer
>free tickets to the symphony
>chocolates

*sigh*

isn't this time of year grand? With its white and wintery setting - its indulgence in giving and receiving. 'tis awesomeness.

my favorite four letter word

FREE!

there is nothing better than getting something you've wanted, for free. I mean the excitement is uncontainable.

Friday night I go to Starbucks to get coffee. Now I've been contemplating buying a french press for awhile now. Mostly because I think they are adorable and I'd be able to make a small amount of coffee for myself. The one I really wanted was about $40.00 and made approximately 8 cups. 10 times more coffee than I should ever drink for sure. I would be like Tigger bouncy, trouncy, flouncy, pouncy
Fun, fun, fun, fun, fun!!

So, I'm deciding on a smaller less fancy plastic model when I look over and see my little beauty staring at me from the clearance shelf. It was so beautiful it took my breathe away.

I get it up to the counter and I'm asking the barista what sort of coffee I should buy as I usually just drink coffee from a coffee shop. I don't buy, grind, brew my own. While I'm asking her this she's trying to ring up my little find and is having some difficulty. She finally looks up as says "I guess you get this for free." I'm stunned. I stand there staring at her like she's from another planet and eeep out "free?!"
"yes, free. It won't ring up so you get it for free."
"really? Free?!"
"yes, really. You get it for free."
"this isn't a joke? I get it for free?"
"yes."
"EEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!" -- pink bunny moment
in the meantime my brother is standing to the side going "damn, I feel like I just lost the lottery. I feel like I just missed out on a golden opportunity."
me: EEEEEEEEE!!! free!!!

n-e-who. so, what sort of roast should I buy?

I am now a bean grinding, brewing, coffee drinkin' machine. I don't think I've come down from my "free" high in the past 5 days.